Adversities in Large and Small Proportions

If I had thought about writing an article these days, I would be doing it from Singapore, but at least the second has not happened. Last Tuesday, just the day of my flight, we had a spectacular storm here in Dubai. In 12 hours, we had the equivalent of two years of rain, with hurricane winds, hailstorms, and lightning. In 15 years of living here, I have never seen anything like this storm.  Dubai is in the desert, and rainfall is scarce. Generally, a good rain is enough to receive alerts on the cell phone. Because there is sand everywhere, the city collapses and floods.  This rain was of epic proportions, and I had a flight with my mom to beautiful Singapore.

We left with a lot of time in advance. The trip to the airport, usually 35 minutes from my house, turned into a two-and-a-half-hour odyssey. After arriving at the airport and checking in, we entered the departure gates and saw from the windows that the tarmac had turned into an ocean. We knew we were going to be there for a long time.

The world's second-busiest airport has halted operations for more than an hour. At an airport where an aeroplane lands every 2 minutes, count the number of passengers who arrive every 2 minutes.

I already knew from the departure gate that our plane had not landed due to weather conditions, and I also knew that at some point, they had to announce the cancellation of the flight.  After seven hours in the departure lounge, they cancelled. Without suitcases, I returned home and embarked on the adventure of being able to arrive without being stranded by the floods.  The ravages caused by the storm were terrible; thousands of cars and buildings flooded, roads looked like rushing rivers, and trees and signs were fallen or destroyed.

The next day, I was referred to another airline so that I could resume my flight. However, there was no flight to resume. The ravages of the previous day had collapsed the airport and the city entirely. Thousands of people camped in the airport terminal because they had nowhere to go, stranded in limbo and without an immediate solution. Nothing to do. I just went back. I cancelled my flight and my hotel reservation. Singapore will be able to wait for us up to a couple of weeks. And when everything normalises, I'll get my bags. And what they charged me for cancelling the hotel, they charged me.

I can't deny it; it was stressful for me and my mom. Of course, I have remained calm and positive in this situation. Why?

Because in the sum of the damages, I didn't lose anything. It is selfish to say it, but when you compare your situation to a catastrophe that has affected thousands of people, not going on vacation and losing the value of the hotel is nothing.

Many people, until today, three days after the storm, do not have access to electricity and water. Many were trapped in their homes and lost their possessions and businesses.  In my house, only a little water leaked through the windows, and a few towels could reduce the leakage; my street did not flood, my car wasn’t damaged, and I had enough food in the refrigerator for many days. I didn't get stranded in a distant country with no place to sleep.

I don't want to see it, or for you to read that “I was lucky” or that I feel superior or that it's interpreted as Schadenfreude (Being happy for the misfortune of others). I was hoping you could take from here that looking for that point of comparison is valid to tell our successes despite the storm. It is in our nature to compare ourselves. But we can channel it better.

Starting from that point of comparison, we reach feelings such as gratitude and appreciation, compassion and solidarity. These feelings help us be flexible, empathetic, and resilient.

Looking around the airport at desperate people who felt in limbo made me pause my plans, appreciate my situation, and realize I have many advantages. It was time not to seek care because I did not need it but because some needed help first.

I was grateful that my situation was 100% manageable with my resources. I calmly and patiently accepted that no one at the airport was guilty or incompetent and that it was best to step aside and let those who could best serve them.

While it was a huge hassle because I didn't reach my scheduled destination, I still felt safe.

There are two types of situations in times of adversity: those that are manageable and those from which there is no turning back. If you ask yourself hard enough, you will realize that most situations in our lives are manageable and temporary. Even those from which there is no turning back, the inevitable happens. You still have to decide, and time will take its purpose to recover.

Being calm in the face of adversity, validating your emotions and giving yourself space before acting are essential steps to avoid falling into drama, making decisions you might regret, hurting others or finally being unable to decide. If you see a thread of solution in your point of comparison, express it in acceptance, appreciation, empathy and solidarity.

Love,

Ivette